Life Is A Balancing Act
By Stephanie Prince Ling MFT
As a mother of two (one just 4 months old) working full time within the mental-health industry, I decided that my theme for the new year (note: I did not use the term “resolution”) is balance.
I had an epiphany just a few short weeks ago as I was running late for work. After almost forgetting to put the baby in the car, I realized I really needed to slow down and figure out how to incorporate more balance into my lifestyle. I realized that I had to examine all facets of my life (time for family and friends, work, self-care, spirituality, etc.), and make sure that I was giving enough attention to each aspect. This self-realization really resonated with me, and at that moment, I could feel my energy and self-confidence change for the better. I realized that maybe I could do it all; be the wife, mother of two, a supervisor, a friend, an older sister, a daughter, etc. I had visions and mantras of “I think I can” running through my head as I skipped to the beat of my own drum, realizing that all I needed was a little balance.
I had this moment of clarity when I realized that in order to do this, I really needed to be present, focus on my needs, and then create a way to make that happen. I decided that putting time and effort into these domains were vital to my soul. This was imperative, as I know that when a big milestone in life occurs (such as having a baby), other parts of life can easily fall by the wayside. I knew that my attention to others was dissipating as I realized that life was passing me by and I hadn’t reached out to certain people. I knew I needed to increase my attention to my health and food needs as I packed on 10 quick pounds after I had just lost my baby weight. I needed to take action. I spoke with my partner and reminded him of the importance of balance and that I needed his help. I explained that I needed his support so that I could connect with my original self; visiting a friend one time a week, planning mealS, going on walks, having some alone time, etc. He agreed and stated he needed similar things. We began to increase our communication by sharing our thoughts (without feelings of guilt or selfishness) as to what we needed to individually nurture our souls. I have to admit that it worked. Those feelings of being overwhelmed and stressed turned into feelings of accomplishments and delight. I accepted as well as celebrated that finding balance is key.
Making sure you are fulfilling your needs within your various roles takes work, time, and patience, but most of all, it takes action. So whether you are an artist, writer, lawyer, mother, brother, actor, or any other kind of person in this crazy, chaotic, hectic world, you too, can create a balanced lifestyle. Be aware, and take action. I know for myself that since my own personal intervention, I have been more present and happy, and when I am happy, my kids are happy and for me. That is success above anything else.
Happy new year, and be good to yourself.